Not As Planned
by musiclifee
Summary: Akira wants to confess. To Tadashi. But she said Ryuu. She told Tadashi that she likes Ryuu. But she likes Tadashi, not Ryuu. Tadashi thinks she likes Ryuu. Confused? Basically, this is my Akira and Tadashi story. Yay!
1. Chapter 1

**my second attempt on a fanfic. ho-hum. i hope it won't suck like my first one. this is my way of showing how akira and tadashi became a couple :D oh, and, sorry for the bad grammar. my writing skills still need a lot of improvements. :) **

**enjoy!**

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That was not supposed to happen.

Toudou Akira, was inside the SA kitchen, doing her usual routine - making tea for everyone. She chose to make jasmine tea and french croissants this time. Before making the tea, she prepared the dough for the croissants ( since it'll take longer to make them ). As she knead the dough, she thought about her friends, the SA. There was her angel, Hikari. Cold-blooded monster Kei. The twins, Megumi and Jun. Animal-lover/attracter Ryuu.

_Hmm. Ryuu.._

Just the thought of Ryuu made her think about that moron Tadashi. And that moron Tadashi made her think of last night. And last night made her think about how stupid she was. And thinking about how stupid she was made her scream.

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!!!" Now kneading the dough harder. She knew kneading it as hard as that will ruined it, but she didn't mind. She needed it to release her anger. _Stupid, stupid, stupid._

She was too busy getting angry at herself to noticed a figure behind her. She felt someone's hand touching her shoulder. She turned around, screamed and immediately went into defense mode, thinking it was a robber trying to steal stuff from the kitchen, or a pervert breaking in. She realized she was wrong when she saw a ( worried ) familliar face.

"We heard you scream. So, I came to check on you. Are you okay?" Hikari said with her hand still on her shoulder.

"Screaming? What screaming? I wasn't screaming!" She replied in total denial.

"You weren't? But, it sounded like you were. And, you're sweating." Hikari stated. Akira touched her face and felt something wet and sticky. "Uh.. I just.. washed my face! It's hot in here!" She said while fanning herself with one hand. Hikari doesn't look convinced.

"Are you sure you're okay?" The jet-black haired girl said again, just to be sure.

"I'm fine, Hikari." Akira reassured her with a smile.

"Well, okay. If you want to talk to someone, you can talk to me." Her friend replied, and exited the kitchen. _Oh, God. I hate it when she does that. _Akira thought. Even though Hikari might be dense, but when it comes to her friends, she could sense something that were troubling them and tries to help. Knowing that Hikari was gone, Akira went back to making food for her friends.

She still couldn't get what happened last night out of her head, though -

Tadashi told her to go to those marriage interviews. Of course, you would be angry if the person you love told you that. See, that's the problem. She loves him. She loves him so much she went loco at him, told him she hated him and ran away, crying. She regretted that. Thinking he must've hate her now. But, everything changed when he took her to see the night that same day.

She remembered going there when they were little. Tadashi brought her to sneak out of Yahiro's birthday party. She was reluctant at first, until he said the night was beautiful. C'mon, little girls can't refuse beautiful things. And for the first time in her life, she felt loved.

Then, he brought her there again. And she felt more loved. She decided that she'll confess to him.

But, she was too nervous, she couldn't speak. Everytime she opened her mouth, it'll close back. Her heart was beating faster than ever, her palms getting sweatier and her mind was about to explode. It was a matter of time till she had enough energy to speak.

"Ta-Tadashi." She said, stammering. She could feel the heat on her cheeks. Her eyes fixed at the night scenery.

"Mmm?" He answered. His eyes too were fixed at the landscape.

"I-I.. I love.." _Okay, I don't wanna do this anymore. Shut up. Shut up. _She thought to herself. But, her body wouldn't listen. She realized Tadashi was silent and his eyes were still focusing on the scenery. _Hey, idiot. I'm confessing here. Look at me. _She heard herself think on it's own and made him look at her.

"I love.." _Shut up. Shut up. SHUT UP. _She could see fear in his eyes. Now why was he afraid? She ignored the thought and focus on shutting herself up. "I.. love.." _SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. _

_Oh, for heaven's sake._

"I LOVE RYUU!!" She said it out loud. And everything went slow-motion. Their shocked eyes locked in each other's. _What? No. I did not say that, right? Did I just said I loved Ryuu?! _Thoughts were flooding her mind. Realizing what she just said, she covered her mouth with both hands. Her eyes widen to the size of tomatoes. She was about to die out of embarassment.

_I JUST TOLD THE GUY I LIKE I LOVED SOMEONE ELSE. Nice, Akira. REALLY NICE._

"A-A-A-Are you serious?" The fear in his eyes were gone and she could see a pool of sadness in it. Like a puppy who lost its momma. She couldn't answer him. Not after what she just said. An awkward silence filled around them. A moment later, Tadashi broke the silence.

"Whoa! That explained why you were so mad at me earlier! You were mad because I told you to go to those interviews, when you already have someone you like, right?"

"N-No-"

She did not managed to protest. "Why didn't you say so?! I won't do that again! And, you're secret's safe with me!" He said with his stupid, goofy grin.

"Tadashi, no, I-"

She was cut off yet again. "C'mon! It's late! We better get home!"

She couldn't believe that guy. She was almost at the point where she could skin him alive. She was trying to explain, to make him understand. But, this guy won't let her. _Oh, what the heck? Why am I angry at him? I'm supposed to be angry at myself. _She tried to control herself. So, she shut herself up when he sent her home. Oh, so now her body listens to her?

And now, here she was. Sulking over it. She already shaped the dough into shapes of croissants. The only thing she needs to do left is to bake them. She almost wished she could bake her head along with the soon-to-be-baked croissants. She sighed.

By the time the croissants was done, she already finished making the jasmine tea. She organized them neatly on a tray and prepared herself to face Tadashi. She faked a smile once she entered the greenhouse. She noticed everyone was there. Kei with his laptop, Hikari with a History book, the twins with Ryuu, and an idiot clutching his ( hungry ) stomach. She groaned at the sight of him.

He smiled at the sight of the food she was carrying. Making her heart somersault, and the fake smile turned into a really angry face.

"Yay! Food! Gimme, gimme, gimme..!" He tried reaching is hand to grab a croissant, but was quickly punched by her. "Ow!"

"Stop being a slob!" She shouted at him, making him weep. "EEEEEPPP!! Scary!" _Good. I'm being myself. _She sighed in relief. "Here, Ryuu." She handed her animal-loving friend a plate with one croissant. Ryuu thanked her with a smile. She smiled back. Then, Tadashi suddenly appeared between them. Ryuu and Akira both looked at him, confused, while Tadashi kept converting his gaze from Ryuu to her. She had no time for his stupidity, and walk away. He stopped her when she was about to exit through the door.

"Akira."

She turned around to face him. He was getting closer, and closer, until he reached her right ear. She could feel his warm breath and his hair touching her cheek. She blushed.

"I won't tell Ryuu.." He whispered into her ear, and joined the others.

She ran to the kitchen, slammed the door, and leaned against it. Somehow, just by hearing him say that made her feel tired. She sat down on the floor, her back still leaning against the door. _Stupid, stupid, stupid. _

She stared at the oven, where she baked her croissants earlier. She let out a heavy sighed. _I wish I had the guts to bake myself._

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**wow. it's prettaayyy long. haha. well, i like it that way. :)**

**i'll update as soon as i can, kays? **

**in the meantime, review this fic please :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**second chapter, people :)**

**thanks for the sweet reviews! i hope im doing a great job.**

**hey, ya'll remembered Natsumi, right? she's the grandaughter of Kokusen High's principal.**

**okay, enjoy!**

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The last bell rang. A sign, meaning that school is over for the day. Students of Hakusen are now allowed to go home.

Akira walked out of the kitchen. Earlier, she had refused to walk to the main school gate with Hikari. She had been tin the kitchen the entire day, trying to avoid Tadashi. Of course there were some knocks on the door, asking her if she's alright. They all did that. All, except for Kei, of course. He's way too attached to that laptop of his. And Kei was joined with Tadashi. He didn't check up on her the whole time she was there.

Well, that's good, though. But somehow, she felt sad knowing that he didn't ask for her reassurance. It made her thought that he didn't care about her.

_Screw him. _She went around the greenhouse. She didn't want to go through that marvel, afraid that she might bumped into Tadashi. She looked at her watch. 5.48. Her limo should be here by now. When she looked in front, he was there.

"Yo." He said with his peace sign. No idiotic grin. _Weird._

"What do you want, Tadashi?" It was such a relief that she managed to be herself.

"I wanna talk to you about something." He shrugged.

"What is it?" She asked as they walked together, keeping their distances.

He didn't answer. _Something's bothering him. _They were silent until they reached the main gate. She saw her limo was already here. There were a few students left around, and unexpectedly, they were approached by a familliar face. The face belonged to a girl, shorter than Akira, her hair dark and shoulder-length. Not too curly and not too straight. She was wearing a Kokusen uniform and was smiling shyly to them.

Correction. Smiling shyly to Tadashi ONLY.

"Natsumi-chan.."

"Umm. Karino-san, there's something I want to say to you.."

He looked at Akira. Asking her if it was okay through his eyes. "Go on." She answered, faking a smile. She saw Natsumi brighten her eyes and smiled. _Wow, she looks happily relieved. Wonder what's this all about..? _With that, she went inside her limo. Looking outside the window, she saw Natsumi with her hands locked together, talking to Tadashi. She suddenly stopped talking, her head lowered to face the ground. Akira shifted her gaze to Tadashi. His mouth was moving, probably saying something.

Like,"Okay". Yeah, she was sure he said "Okay".

_Why did he say "Okay"? _She thought. _Never mind. _"Let's go." She ordered her driver. And he did as told.

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The next day, Akira headed to the greenhouse as soon as she got to school. Usually, she'll head to the kitchen. But, not this time. Somehow, she had a need to ask Tadashi about his conversation with Natsumi yesterday. She wanted to know why he said "Okay".

As she walked closer to where the SA always gather, she saw Hikari talking to Kei, about a challenge, probably. Megumi and Jun were clinging to Ryuu while sending death glares to Ryuu's animals, as usual. Then there was the idiot, Tadashi, who apparently didn't look like his normal idiotic self, staring blankly at the floor. Akira almost thought that he was a mannequin.

After everyone ( except Tadashi ), said 'Good Morning' to her, and of course she replied them back, she sat next to Tadashi.

"Oi, idiot."

No response.

"Tadashi. Dude, you okay?"

Still no response. She was getting worried now. She got more worried when she shook her free hand in front of him, and he didn't gave her any response. She realized the others were watching.

"KARINO TADASHI, YOU STUPID IDIOT!! TALK TO ME!!!!" She screamed at him. It sent him to the ground.

"What? What? What's going on?" He got up.

"Obviously, I was trying to talk to you. What's up with you?" _Geez, why did I fell in love with this guy._

"Oh, uh. Nothing."

_Nothing?! NOTHING?! Clearly, it was SOMETHING! _She thought, getting angrier and angrier. "Are you sure it was nothing?" She said, trying to control her anger. He nodded as an answer. _Oh, you can't fool me, moron. _She dragged him to the kitchen, he protested, but she ignored him. She closed the door to the kitchen and faced him. He looked confused.

"There's something wrong with you." She said with her arms crossed.

"Nothing's wrong with me." He lied.

"Does it have anything to do with yesterday?" She didn't want to ask what he wanted to say to her yesterday, what she wants to know is the conversation he and Natsumi had because that's more important.

"What happened yesterday?"

"Tadashi."

They were staring at each other's eyes. Somehow, she could see that his eyes were sending her messages like, _"Please just leave me alone, I don't wanna lie to you."_. But that was crazy, so she cared less about that. He let out a heavy breath.

"Wanna talk to me now?" She continued, breaking the silence.

He sat on a counter, his eyes weren't looking at hers. And, she sat next to him, shoulder to shoulder. For some reason, even the slightest brush of his shoulder made her heart flipped. She took a deep breath. It took him some time to speak.

"Natsumi.. She asked me to be her boyfriend." He said, not looking at her.

Now that, was a slap in the face. She bet a slap in the face will hurt less than this. _I cannot believe this. No way. No freakin way. _She tried to think positive. This wasn't supposed to happened if she didn't say she liked Ryuu instead of him. This wasn't supposed to happened _at all._

It wasn't long until she remembered something. _He said "Okay", didn't he?_

She needs to ask him this, despite the fact that she already knew what his answer will be.

"And, what d-did.. you say?" She was trying her best to hide the tremor in her voice.

"I said, 'Okay'."

_I knew it, I knew it, I KNEW IT._

"You, idiot! Do you even liked her? I mean, _liked _her liked her?!" Instead of saying that, she answered him with a standard "Oh."

They sat there together (queitly) for far too long. She had to say something, and maintain her cool, and control her tears from falling. God, she hated multi-tasking. While thinking of something to say, she could see him deep in his thoughts from the corner of her eye, his arms crossed and he was slouching his back. She sighed.

"Are you sure you wanna be her boyfriend?"

"I can't break the girl's heart, right?"

He answered pretty quickly. Like, he was prepared to answer her questions. She heard him let out a sigh. She felt like saying what she should've said earlier, "Do you even _liked_ her liked her?". But once again, her body would not listen to her, she ended up saying "Okay."

And while he wouldn't move from his position, Akira decided to leave him there and make tea for the others. She didn't realized he left without saying anything when she was done making tea. She served the tea to the SA, she didn't dare to look at Tadashi right now. After that, she went staright to the kitchen. When she was sure the coast was clear, she cried.

She was heart-brokened.

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**okay, is 'heart-brokened' even a word?**

**please review, kays :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**thanks again for reviewing, guys. means a lot to me! you shall be blessed for your kindness! Amen :)**

**oh, special message to LYEN! I KNOW YOU. mwahahaha XD**

**here's chapter 3! hope you'll enjoy it :D**

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_(Akira)_

Wow, I cried a lot. That sucks. What sucks more is I'm crying over a stupid guy. I've never cried over a guy before. Until now. It took a lot of energy for me to get a hold of myself. I grab my bag and stuck my hand inside it to find my small mirror. I stared long and hard at my reflection. God, I looked awful. My eyes were puffy, my nose was red and I looked paler than usual. I figured I should stay here till' I looked like myself again.

As expected, my friends came to check on me. Actually, my friends (Tadashi's definitely NOT included, sadly.) forced _Kei _to check on me. I know, it sounds really weird. I freaked out, too, when he looked at me and asked,

"You've been crying?" He sounded shocked but maintain his 'cool'.

"I don't have time to deal with you. What are you doing here?" I said, looking outside the window instead of him. It was very weird of him to asked me that. Ugh, whatever.

"They made me come here. They're worried about you, y'know?" His voice turned to normal.

"I'm okay." I finally looked at him and faked a smile.

"I know you're not." _Crap, how did he seen through me?_

Okay, I know my friends love me and worry about me and all, but I'm seriously too tired to handle someone right now and I think I'm getting a serious headache. Not that I didn't appreciate their concern for me. So, instead of replying him, I turned my back against him and breathed out a sigh. I think he was expecting me to reply him because we were silent for a while. But, the silence shattered when he said something that made me froze,

"I don't know what the hell was he thinking, going out with a girl he barely knew."

I faced him, he was looking at me with an eyebrow raised. "Wh-What are you talking about?" I was so glad I could still speak. He snorted.

"He just told us about him and that Natsumi-girl. And believe me," He raised both of his hands, "none of us were too thrilled about it. We figured he'd end up with you, since it's so obvious you two liked each other." He gave me a friendly smile. Seeing him smile like that is very, VERY rare and it made me shivered a little.

I was shocked when he said the last sentence. They knew I liked Tadashi all along? And, Tadashi used to liked me? I wanted to ask Kei. But if I do, then I'll get a headache again, so, instead, I lowered my head and my voice and said something else, "He doesn't like me. He thinks I liked Ryuu." I suddenly thought about the night where I decided I wanted to confess to Tadashi, and ended up saying I liked Ryuu. God, I hate myself for that.

"And why's that..?" He looked confused, now.

"I rather not talk about it." _Hell, yeah, I rather not._

"Hmm." He nodded, "Well, don't worry. I think Hikari's thinking up a plan to break them up and set_ you _up with him. So, you just wait, okay?" I laughed at his remark and he gave me that friendly smile again. Okay, he's definitely not normal today. He smiled like that TWICE. I controlled myself from shivering.

"Okay." I tried to smile back at him. Then I remembered something, "What are you gonna tell them?"

"Hmm," For a moment there, he looked confused again, "Oh, I'll just tell them you didn't get enough sleep last night and you're feeling really tired now."

"Nice." I said sarcastically and giving him a sarcastic look. "And, thanks."

"No prob." He gave me that friendly smile. AGAIN. Whoa, three times in one day. That must've been some sort of record, huh? So, I said,

"Lemme guess. Hikari did something you liked?" I smirked and crossed my arms.

He flinched, and returned to normal again, "You know me to well." He said. Then, he chuckled his way to the greenhouse.

I laughed. He's weird sometimes. Talking to him wasn't so bad. Maybe I should trust him with Hikari more. They are a couple, anyway. They love each other. I want that stupid moron Tadashi to love me back, too. Oh, hell, what was I thinking?! I can't force him to love me!

I closed my eyes and sighed. And when I opened my eyes, I spotted my small mirror on the counter. I picked it up and examined my face. Well, at least I looked better than earlier.

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I didn't want to go back home after school. My parents were at home for the day for some reason (they're really busy people, and seeing them at home is a rare sight.), and I was too tired to deal with them. So, as soon as I got in to my limo, I told the driver to drive to the one place I'll always love.

The place where Tadashi took me to see the night.

I couldn't wait to see the star-filled night sky and the shimmering city lights. I couldn't wait to just close my eyes and drift my problems away with the night breeze, wishing it could all just go away. And maybe I could also wish for Tadashi to go away. Speaking of Tadashi, he was nowhere to be seen when school ended today. I remembered Hikari saying he left early or something. Now, why would he left early? I knew his mom wouldn't like that.

I told the driver to drop me somewhere near the place, and walked from there, instead. When I got to the place, I saw someone watching the night sky. The guy looked familliar. As I walked closer to him, I realized who he was,

"Hey." I placed both of my hands on the steel fence and watched the city lights. I could feel his eyes on me.

"Hi." He answered back. I could see he was no longer looking at me from the corner of my eye.

"What are you doing here?" I was determined to not have awkward silences with him anymore.

"Thinking. What are you doing here?"

"Thinking, too."

We were silent for a while. But, it wasn't awkward. Our eyes were both fixed on the night scenery. It was so beautiful. And, it was even more beautiful watching it with Tadashi. I sneaked a look at him. I think he's thinking the same thing, too, except without the watching-it-with-you part. I looked back at the scenery again.

Okay, that's it. I won't ask for more. I liked being just friends with him, I think. And, besides, he has a girlfriend. Hello? I can't snatch someone else's boyfriend because that's wrong. Unless they broke up and I could use that oppurtunity to get him. NO! I can't think like that! What is wrong with me? Get yourself together, Akira! Do not turn yourself into a -

"Akira. Are you listening to me?" He stopped me from my inner babble.

"What? Huh? What were you saying?"

"I asked you what are you thinking about?" He repeated what I didn't hear him said.

_Oh, I was just thinking about us just being friends, but I'll be happy if you break up with Natsumi and I'll use that chance to get you. I'm turning into a ho, am I? _No way in hell was I gonna say that, "My parents. They're at home now."

"Oh, say 'Hi' to them for me." He said. Wow, I was so glad he can't read my mind.

"Okay. What are you thinking about?" I asked him back with his question.

"Nothing much." He shrugged.

And again, we were silent. Letting the breezy air cool us. I was getting a little cold, but I didn't mind. All of a sudden, my left arm was getting warmer. I realized his arm was brushing mine as he shifted his weight from foot to foot. I chewed my lip hard from keeping myself to smile like a fool.

"How's Natsumi?" I asked him, pretty straight-forward of me, huh? I didn't look at him when I asked.

"She's.. okay." He stopped for a while to find the right words. Then, he continued, "She called me last night. We're going shopping tomorrow."

_Oh, God. You're supposed to go shopping with me. _How could I say that? So, instead I said, "Oh." And added, "Since when do you like shopping?" I looked at him teasingly.

"I didn't say I liked shopping, bear lady." He said with his arms crossed and an eyebrow raised. I kicked his shin, "Ouch!" He rubbed it with his hand, and suddenly bursted into laughter.

"What's so funny?!" I was really angry at him, but I couldn't help feeling a little overwhelmed by his name-calling.

"Nothing. It's just," He stopped to laugh and wipe the tears from the edges of his eyes, "you resembled a lot like a bear." He laughed again.

"You are such an idiot!" I hit his head, that made him shut up. I turned my back against him and controlled myself from giggling. And tottaly beyond my expectations, he put his hands on my shoulders and sent chills down my spine.

"Hey, c'mon. I was just joking," I heard him say. Then, he turned my body making me face him, "Just relax, will ya'?" He smiled at me.

And we stood there like that for a very long time, staring at each other's eyes and enjoying the moment. Okay, I was. I don't know if he's enjoying it. I felt my cheeks flushed, hoping he couldn't see my face turning into a very unattractive shade of red in the semi-darkness. We were both startled by the sudden ringing of my cellphone. He let go of me, and I reached for my still-ringing cellphone in my pocket.

"H-Hello?" My voice was shaky when I answered the call.

"Akira, darling! Where are you? Come home, now!" The voice sounded concern and relief.

"Okay, mom. I'll go home now." I reassured her and noticed my voice wasn't shaky anymore.

"I sent the driver to pick you up. It's a good thing he knows where you are. He should be there by now." My mom was no longer worried.

"Thanks, mom. See ya' at home."

"Okay, sweetheart. Bye." She ended the call. I put my cellphone back in my pocket.

"You're going home?" I forgot Tadashi was still there till' it made me jumped at his voice.

"Umm.. Yeah." I said to him. I looked behind and saw car lights shining the road. The lights moved farther away and in came the limo. I motioned my head back to him, "So, I guess I'll see ya' later."

"Yeah, Bye." He bid me with a wave.

I walked fastly to the limo and got in. Looking outside the moving window, I saw Tadashi was now watching the night sky and how I wished I was still there to watch it with him. I know, when I get home, my parents are tottaly going to freak at me for coming home late because that's not my normal behavior.

Ah, hell.

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**wooh! like it? i think i made a lotta mistakes here. D:**

**don't kill me fer that o.O"**

**puh-lease review again, kaylio? especially LYEN. again, i say, I KNOW YOU. ohohoho XD**


	4. Chapter 4

**woohoo! chapter 4, peeps! **

**I don't really know what kind of parents Akira has, so I just made them up. hope you guys don't mind. :|**

**enjoy and review, kays? :) **

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_(Akira)_

Hah. I knew you it. I knew I was going to get in trouble when I got home. Being a single child sometimes sucks because your parents only cares about you. Well, my parents are very over-protective over me, but that makes them predictable. When I opened the main door to my house, – which leads to my living room, of course. – they rushed to me with worried faces (okay, my mom was. My dad has a you're-in-big-trouble,-young-lady face.).

"Oh, honey! Where've you been? We were so worried!" My mom said and pulled me into a hug.

"Why did you come home late?" My dad said sternly after my mom pulled away from the hug.

"I needed some fresh air." That wasn't technically a lie. I really wanted some fresh air. Other than that, I really wanted Tadashi to be my boyfriend. Damn it, here comes my ho-ness.

"Well, your actions are improper for a young girl like you. You are grounded. No shopping this weekend." My dad said, pointing a finger at me.

_Improper? I only went out for some air and you called that 'improper'?! _"But, daddy –"

"No, buts. Go to your room, now." He cut me off and pointed his thumb to my room.

"Mom..?" I pleaded her with a please-don't-agree-with-dad-and -that-punishment look.

"I'm sorry, honey." She patted my shoulder. Obviously, she didn't get my look.

I grunted, and stomped to my room. When I was in my bedroom, I threw myself on the bed. The light wasn't on, so I was lying in semi-darkness. The moon became my light.

I closed my eyes and thought about tonight. Watching the night with Tadashi was the best feeling ever. Wouldn't it be nice if we could do that everyday? It would. We would hold hands and just enjoy the breath-taking view.

Okay, I have got to stop thinking like that. I don't want to turn into a ho or a slut or whatever. I slapped my forehead and I brushed my hair with my hand. He is seriously giving me a headache. Can't I just –

"Akira, honey? Are you alright? Can I come in?" I heard my mom's voice through the door. Her voice made me stopped talking crap to myself and sat up. She knocked the door twice.

"Umm, yeah. You can come in." I said. She opened the door and gave me a very warm motherly smile. Then, she looked around the room,

"Why is it so dark in here?" She scrunched her nose and turned on the light. I blinked at the sudden brightness that lighted my room. She looked at me again, "Are you okay, honey?"

"I'm fine." I replied. She sat down on the bed next to me.

"I'm sorry about your father. He loves you, y'know?" She said, thinking it was because of the punishment I was down instead of Tadashi.

"I know, mom. Don't sweat bout' it." I reassured her with a smile.

"Well, okay. Go and take a bath, honey. Don't ruin that perfect skin of yours." She said. Yeah, I was feeling a little bit sticky and _eww._

I laughed, "Kay'. Goodnight, mom."

"Goodnight, sweetie." She left the room.

I took a nice, long, hot shower. The water calmed me and soothed me with its warmness, making me forget about Tadashi and other stuff that was stressing my life right now. After I'd finished taking the shower, I changed into my PJs', turned off the light and fell asleep. And then, I started dreaming.

In my dream, I was in the school kitchen preparing tea for my friends. I saw Tadashi went into the room and stared at me dreamily. I was trying really hard not to blush,

"What are you staring at?" I gave him an annoyed look.

He was still staring at me, "Have I ever told you, you're beautiful?"

Okay, that was so weird, "W-What?" I stammered, not moving from my position because what he just said made my entire body froze.

"I said you're beautiful." He went closer to me.

I moved away, "Go away, Tadashi."

"No. I don't want to. I want to stay here with you." He hugged me. I widened my eyes in shock. Is he sick or something? I didn't want to move because I liked him hugging me. Or maybe because I was so shocked, I wasn't able to move.

When I finally had my sense back, I pulled away from him and put my hands on his chest with his hands holding me, "What's wrong with you?"

"I love you." He pulled me closer till our foreheads touched, "Do you love me?"

I could feel his breath under mine and saw his mouth curving into a smile. My body literally stiffen, "Y-Yes." I managed to say.

"Good."

And just when we were about to kiss, I was awakened by my stupid alarm clock and found myself on my bed. I glared at my alarm clock. It was ringing irritatingly, and hurting my ears. Why did I even set an alarm for a Saturday? Anyway, if I had a hammer right now, I'd swear I'll smack it like the cartoons do.

So, instead of smacking the alarm clock with a hammer (I wish..), I turned the thing off before it starts making me crazy. I got up from my bed and stared at myself in the mirror. Darn, I have bed head. Not wanting to stare at my ugly hair, I quickly went to the bathroom and took a shower. And once again, the water made me feel much better.

* * *

The weekend had past really quickly, and I spent my time at home doing nothing but watching MTV all day long. And, developed a new crush on Michael Buble. I know, that's completely random. But, at least I had a crush on someone else other than that moron.

Seriously, I really gotta stop thinking about him.

As usual, I went straight to the kitchen once I arrived at school. I'm going to make them egg tarts and Earl Grey Tea today. So, I prepared the ingredients on the counter. Then, _he _came in.

"Akira! What's for breakfast?" He said in his usual obnoxious self. Well, at least he's back to normal and not acting weird anymore.

I gave him a death glare, "Haven't you ate breakfast yet, Tadashi?!"

"Y-Y-Yes. B-But I'm still hungry.." He backed away and covered himself with his hands. I sighed.

"Egg tarts." I said, and started making them.

"Oh, yay! I was craving for some earlier! You always know what I want, Akira!" He gave me a cocky smile. I turned away from him so that he couldn't see my blushing. I focused myself on making the tarts.

I could sensed he was still in the room, even though my back was facing him and it was silent. And somehow, I keep getting this feeling that his eyes were on me. I heard him breathed out a sigh, evidence that he was there.

"Do you even liked Natsumi?" I said it quickly and prepared myself for his answer. When he didn't answer, I gave him a I'm-waiting look.

He blinked and shrugged, "I don't know."He rubbed his head, "I guess. She's a nice girl." He blinked at me again, and I turned away from him.

What was that supposed to mean? Does he liked her or not? I don't know if I should breakdown and cry, or scream in joy. I sighed and continued making the tarts. Then, he said something that I didn't expect he would asked me in a million years,

"Do you liked Ryuu?"

I froze for a second, and shrugged, "I don't know. I guess. He's a good guy." It was silent again for a moment. Then, he laughed.

"You just said what I said!" He laughed even harder.

I went closer to him, "That's not funny!" I stepped on his foot, making him stop laughing and started screaming in pain.

"Ow! Ow! Ow!" He held the foot that I stepped on and he was now hopping on one foot. Seeing him like that made me laughed uncontrollably because it was too hilarious.

"Ohmygod, Tadashi," I stopped to laugh, then, I continued, "you are such a dork!" I laughed again.

He finally settled his foot on the ground and looked at me, and laughed along.

After minutes of uncontrollable laughing, we finally stopped. We sat down on the floor with our backs leaning against the counter, catching our breaths. _I wished we could do this everyday._ I thought to myself and smiled. Then, we looked at each other.

He smiled goofily at me, and I snorted. His smile faltered and he didn't kept his eyes away from me. i did the same, too.

Yes, it was weird. Yes, I felt like kissing him (but as you know, I can't.). He stared at me for a long time, and I had to stop it before I blush madly, sadly,

"Why are you staring at me?" I said, "Is there something on my hair?" I brushed my hair with both hands.

He blinked, "No, no! Uhh, you better go and make those tarts. I'm starving." He said, and stood up. Is it just me, or did I just see him blushed?

"Yeah. I should." _Jeez, all you think about is food. _I stood up and went to the counter with the about-to-be-baked tarts.

He headed to the door with his hands in his pockets, "Tell me when they're done, kay?"

"Okay." I said. But, he was already gone.

* * *

**i don't really know how to write an almost-kissing scene. let alone a kissing scene :(**

**if you guys give me reviews, i'll consider researching..? O.O**

**ahh, okay. i don't know bout' u, but this whole kissing-talk is making me uncomfortable.**

**and doesn't this look the same as chapter 3? gasp! i'm having writer's block! DX**

**umm. review while i look for ideas, kay? :)**

**i won't fail ya'll!**


	5. Chapter 5

**OMG! It's chapter 5! *confetti everywhere!***

**i am SO sorry for not updating for such a long time! my apologies!!! D8**

**thx a bunch fer the reviews, people! i'm so glad a lot of you guys like my story!**

**okay, i should stop gettin' all teary-eyed now. enjoy chapter 5 :)**

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_(Akira)_

There we were. At the balcony. Enjoying each other's presence (again I say, I was. I'm not sure about him.). Watching the moon shining the night sky, making the clouds visible. The strong wind, blowing our hair, I was beginning to think that it's going to rain. I sighed and looked at him. He looked back.

Okay, rewind. I so know you guys are totally clueless right now, so, I should fill you guys in on this. Harharhar.

Days had past after the awkward situation Tadashi and I had in the kitchen. It wasn't long till' it was Saturday. Sakura invited me to her 10th monthsary with Jun at her villa. And, obviously, I was more excited seeing my Hikari and Megumi in a cute dress than the party itself. I decided to go classy with a strapless, black, knee-length dress. Yes, it's simple. But, I looked good. Bahaha.

I stared at myself in the mirror after I finished putting on my makeup. And yes, you guessed it. I was thinking about Tadashi again. He was going to show up with Natsumi, I just know that. And seeing him with her might break my heart.

Pfft. Cut with the mushy love crap. I'm a strong and intelligent woman (okay, teenager.), and I won't be affected by some stupid crush.

Wanting to stop myself from saying more crap, I head to my waiting-limo outside my house and told the driver to send me to hell (I actually said to Sakura's villa, but, you get what I mean, right?).

"Akira! I'm so, so, so, so, so, SO glad you made it." An excited Sakura greeted me, hand-in-hand with Jun.

"Congrats to you two!" I congratulate both of them with a hug.

"We thought you wouldn't come," Jun said, and started looking nervous, "since, y'know. You and.. umm, Tadashi and-"

I raised a hand at him, "You don't have to mention that, Jun."

"Sorry." He said, timidly.

"Umm, Jun honey-dear. Can I talk to Akira-chan alone for a while?" Sakura said to Jun. And Jun nodded at her and head to Ryuu. Sakura took my hand and led me to her room and closed the door.

I saw a lot of people having a good time down there before entering her room. Seriously, there were at least 50 people down there. But, I didn't see any sign of Tadashi.

Oh, crap. I don't wanna think about him now.

Sakura closed the door to her room. "Uhh, Akira. I sort of invited Natsumi to the party. I didn't want to at first! But, she's a friend and, umm.. You understand, right?" She said nervously, just like Jun earlier. But, she was picking her fingers.

"Oh, Sakura. It's okay! I can deal with it. No problem at all." I was surprised at the sudden confidence in my voice. Hope that'll convince her.

"Really? Aww, Thank you, Akira!" She hugged me tightly. "So, shall we go downstairs?"

"Sure."

Sakura brought me to Hikari. She was sitting next to Kei. I saw him whispering something to her ear, and she blushed. He better not tell her stuff that'll ruin her angel-ness. Ignoring Kei, I greeted Hikari cheerfully, "Hey, Hikari my sweet angel!" I hugged her, earning a snort from Kei. I glared at him, "Stupid monster Kei."

"Nice to see you, too, Akira." He said with a mocking tone. Oh, I so wanna kill him.

"If you weren't my sweet-honey Hikari's boyfriend, I would totally smack you to your death right now." I glared at him again.

"But if you kill me, Tadashi might not like you anymore cuz' you're so violent and unlady-like." He said it calmly and mockingly. I could feel my face flushed at the sound of Tadashi's name.

"SHUT UP!!" I stomped away, angrily. I could hear Hikari saying something like "Don't be so mean" and heard Kei chuckled.

I made a mental note in my head to kill Kei by hiring a professional assassin to do the job later.

I suddenly realized I was at the balcony of the villa. The wind was making me cold and I started to shiver a little. Then, I stared at the moon. It was shining the sky and the backyard of the villa. The night was really pretty, I must say. Somehow, it calms me.

No, I am not a vampire, okay?

Anyway, back to the story. The wind was blowing on me again, making me shiver more. I rubbed both of my arms to warm it. And, suddenly, I felt something on my back. I glanced at my shoulders and noticed that it was a black jacket.

Someone had put it there on my shoulder.

I looked to my left and saw Tadashi watching the view with me. What was he doing here? And, where's Natsumi?

"I saw you shivering so I figured you must be cold here. And, I gave you that jacket. Oh, Natsumi's over there with Sakura." He said all of a sudden.

"Whoa, wait. You can read my mind, now?" I said, completely bamboozled.

"You said it out loud, devil woman."

I hit his head as soon as I heard that stupid nickname. "Own!" He yelled and massaged his head. "Hey, y'know it's really not attractive if you hit someone in the head when you're wearing a pretty dress." He added while looking away.

I blinked. _Did he just say I was attractive?_ I blushed at the thought of it. "Excuse me?" I said and looked at him as soon as I realized the blush in my face was gone.

He turned his face at me and said, "What?" He rubbed his head.

I hesitated for a moment, "...Nothing.". I looked back at the view and from the corner of my eye, I could see him watching the view with me again.

So, now you guys aren't confused anymore, right? Good. I'll continue then.

So. There we were. At the balcony. Enjoying each other's presence (again I say, I was. I'm not sure about him.). Watching the moon shining the night sky, making the clouds visible. The strong wind, blowing our hair, I was beginning to think that it's going to rain. I sighed and looked at him. He looked back.

"There's something I gotta set straight to you." I said. He just stood there, looking at me, silently.

Seriously. I don't want him to think I like Ryuu. Enough. It's time I tell him the truth. Well, okay. Part of the truth. I can't tell him I_ like,_ like him. He has a girlfriend, remember? He might think I'm a ho (which, I am, judging by how much I really, really want him) and never talk to me again.

I took a deep breath, "The thing is, I don't like Ryuu." I paused, "I like someone else."

He looked at the view again and said, "Hmm. Then, who is it?" I saw him did something weird. Like, trying not to smile. _Jeez, weirdo._

I ignored it and answered his question casually, "Oh, just this guy." I laughed a little at my answer. It was seriously lame. Why couldn't I think of a better answer?

I turned back to watch the night view. The wind blew again. But, I was kept warm by his jacket and the scent of it. I was about to say "But, he's with someone else.". But, he blew the chance.

"I think Natsumi's looking for me." He looked behind him, searching for Natsumi.

I felt like my heart had been shattered into a million pieces. I batted my eyes to prevent the tears from falling, "You better go, then." Then, I remembered something, "Here." I gave him his jacket back.

"Thanks." He said to me, "I'll see you at school." He smiled at me, like a friend, and went back into the villa. And, as I watch him walk away, I began thinking to myself, that I won't stop loving him.

Even if it means he's breaking my heart every time he's with her.

* * *

**so, is it okay?**

**i have to say, that this chapter was kinda boring. hhahahaha. **

**please review, kaylio? thanks a bunch, loves! **


	6. Chapter 6

**At last! Chapter 6 is finally done! PHEW! I am so so so so SO sorry for making you guys wait so long for the story to be updated. It's just school is so stressful and I don't really have the time to update :(**

**But I'll try my best, okay? :)**

**Well, enough of the dwelling. Enjoy, chappie 6 :D**

**And make sure you review after this! Pretty please?**

* * *

I got tired of staying out there on the balcony, alone and cold. So, I decided to go back inside and enjoy myself. And, maybe get a little crazy.

But, these days, things just don't go the way I planned.

I look around the ballroom for Hikari. You know, for company. I even asked Jun and Sakura -who were snuggling in a corner- for her. Then, I thought, _maybe she's with that Monster Kei somewhere around here. Oh, no. What if he did something to my precious Hikari?! I must find her! _Okay, I know I can get seriously paranoid if Hikari's with Kei. It's not my fault she's my first real female friend after Yui. Blame her for making friends with me.

Back to the story, since I already look around inside the villa, I resolved to look for her outside. I walked to the backyard (which was really huge) and see if I could find her there.

I started walking on a brick road; along the road were rose bushes and lampposts that stretched all the way to the end. The place was silent. As a consequence, I can only here my heels tapping rhythmically on the road. It started to get a little spooky and chilly, and I was wondering if I should go back inside.

My thoughts stop when I suddenly heard something.

Voices. I was hearing voices. Were they in my head? It was so quiet that it didn't even occurred to me that someone might be here. Or maybe, just maybe, I have sixth sense. Now, that's when I started to freak out. I mean, I don't want to see _things_ that are not meant to be seen.

_Don't be silly! _There's no such thing as ghosts, right? I began thinking rationally and asked myself, there's got to be a logical explanation here. And the next thing I knew was me doing something that I would never, ever do in my life - I followed the voices of the may-be-ghosts.

As I was getting closer to it, I could see two dark figures; the voices became louder and louder. I tiptoed quietly (trust me, it's hard to tiptoe when you're wearing heels) and hid behind a tree so that it was clear enough for me to hear -or in this case, eavesdrop- the conversation. One voice belonged to a girl and the other a dude. The girl sounded angry, but, the dude sounded calm. And, somehow, I keep getting the feeling that the two voices sounded familiar to me. Well, at least they weren't ghosts. Haha.

"You promised me you'll try!" I heard the girl said.

"I did try. But, it was too hard for me." The dude replied, still sounding cool.

"Stop making excuses! It's just... I just want you to..." The girl's voice trailed off and she began sobbing.

"Natsumi..."

Holy crap! Is it who I think it is? Natsumi, as in the granddaughter of Kokusen High's principal? I controlled myself from gasping and cursing out loud. Then, another thought hit me. If the girl was Natsumi, then the dude must be-

"Tadashi, please." Natsumi said.

Oh. My. God. I should not be here right now.

"I just want you to really, really like me." Natsumi continued.

"I do. But-"

"But, what?! You don't, don't you?! You never did!"

Did I heard that right? So, all this time Tadashi never really liked Natsumi? Yeah, yeah, I know he said that he 'guessed' he liked her when we were having one of our awkward situations in the kitchen last time. But, I thought he was shy to seriously admit it. Wait a minute, if he never really, really _liked _her, then why hook up with her? I'm confused.

My position was getting uncomfortable, so, I changed into a more comfortable position. And, I was being extra careful not to make any sounds. Until I stepped on a twig. I was thankful I didn't screamed.

"What was that?" I heard Tadashi said.

For a moment there, I thought he was going to find me, because I heard small steps. Miraculously, he didn't proceed because of Natsumi,

"Probably a small animal." Then there was a long pause, "Can we talk somewhere else?"

"Sure."

I stood silently and still against the tree trunk, hoping they wouldn't find me. They didn't, seeing as they went back to where I just came from. I let out a breath when they were far enough away. And, as I watched them walk away, I noticed they weren't holding hands like a real couple should. They were also keeping their distances from each other.

At that time, I couldn't help wondering to myself, _What's going on with them?_

* * *

**Yeah. Umm. I'm sorry for the shortness. But like I said! I'll try my best :DD**

**I will love you so much if you take some of your time to review this chapter :)**


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